Tag Archives: letting go

Release and wait

8 Mar

Someone sent this to me over the weekend. It couldn’t have been more timely. You see, I have a BAD habit of doing the things that she speaks of: trying to establish a healthy relationship with someone who is clearly not right for me instead of waiting patiently for what God has for me. Yep, I do it and have done it often. But a recent experience with someone I’ve dated on- and off-again for 9 years has led me to say “ENOUGH!”

I think it’s hard for us to walk away from relationships or friendships even though we know they are detrimental because it makes us feel like failures. We feel like we aren’t good enough or competent. Sometimes we just have to throw our hands up and say “There’s nothing more I can do to make this work. It’s time to give up.” Man, that’s a hard thing to say, especially if you still love someone. But love shouldn’t hurt.

I can’t blame everyone else for my failed relationships. I am owning up to the ways in which I’ve sabotaged my own life. I haven’t made the best choices when it comes to relationships. It’s a hard thing to admit.

Iyanla Vanzant says this in her book Acts of Faith:

You can do the same old things in just so many ways until you lose track of what you are doing. How many ways can you cry? How many ways can you hurt? How many ways can you convince yourself that you can make this work? When a relationship is over, you must learn to let go.

It’s time I let go….

Let it Go

6 Dec

An oldie but goodie….

Let It Go – by T. D. Jakes

There are people who can walk away from you.

And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk.. I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.

When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.

The bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]

People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can’t make them stay.

Let them go.

And it doesn’t mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over. And you’ve got to know when people’s part in your story is over so that you don’t keep trying to raise the dead.. You’ve got to know when it’s dead.

You’ve got to know when it’s over. Let me tell you something.. I’ve got the gift of good-bye. It’s the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye.. It’s not that I’m hateful, it’s that I’m faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He’ll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don’t need it. Stop begging people to stay.

Let them go!!

If you are holding on to something that doesn’t belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains LET IT GO!!!

If someone can’t treat you right, love you back, and see your worth LET IT GO!!!

If someone has angered you LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better LET IT GO!!!

If you’re stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won’t even try to help themselves LET IT GO!!!

If you’re feeling depressed and stressed LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying ‘take your hands off of it,’ then you need to LET IT GO!!!

‘The Battle is the Lord’s!’

I need a new pair of shoes

21 Aug

Hey world! It’s been awhile since I’ve blogged. I’ve had lots of things on my mind lately and I thought I’d share one of them. Once again, I want to pull a quote from Iyanla Vanzant’s Acts of Faith:

When we convince ourselves that we can’t find the right mate, we try to make the one we have into the one we want….When we are not honest with ourselves about who are mate really is, we end up disillusioned and disappointed. It is not their fault, it is our own. We must be clear about what we want from a relationship whether it is social, business or intimate. Then we must make a decision to wait for exactly what we want. If who we have is not who we want, say so! It is not our job to change the other person. If we buys a pair of shoes and they do not fit, should we wear them and suffer or take them back to the store?

Ladies, do we ever say, “well if he just did this, we’d be ok” or “maybe if I can convince him to be like this, things would be better”? Where do we get the idea that we can change someone? We have a lot of talents but we don’t have super powers! I’m learning that if someone or something doesn’t mesh with your values or ideals, then it’s ok to acknowledge that and move on.

It’s time we wait for what God has planned for us rather than trying to take a unhealthy situation and turn it into what we think is best for us. In our “meantime” we should develop our interests and our spirituality and just be.

Now on to just being….

Letting go

6 Jul

It’s hard to let go of something or someone that you love and cherish. But sometimes it’s the best thing for you. I read once that not everyone is meant to have a front row seat in your life. That’s so true. But that doesn’t make it any easier to let go of those “unhealthy” people or situations that aren’t good for you. When I go thru these things, I just have to remind myself that I’m “in the meantime” and letting go won’t always hurt so bad in the future. I just pray that God will present me with new opportunities for better relationships and better situations. Waiting is the hard part though.

Definition of crazy . . .more

14 Jun

Ok. So I’m off work now. I guess you wordpress viewers can kind of guess that my love life is out of sorts. But to expand on my previous post:

Sometimes in love you have to just let go. When you’ve tried all that you know to do, when you’ve put forth 110%, when you’ve given all you had and there was still no change, it’s time to say goodbye. That is, if the person you’re with is not putting in the same amount of effort. Hence the definition of crazy: to continue to do the same thing expecting different results. When you continue to give all you can and it still doesn’t make a difference, it’s time to move on. Maybe the other person will wake up, maybe not. But you’ve got to do it for you.

Making sense of life

11 Jun

I saw this on someone else’s page and I thought it was worth posting here:

I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things to wrong so that you can appreciate them when they’re right, you believe lies so you can eventually learn to trust no one but [God and] yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.